I’m constantly looking at apartments, town houses, condos, and lofts for rent/sale all over the place. I’m itching to get out of here more than ever. I’m not looking to be in a big crazy nightlife filled city, just somewhere I can start over. Somewhere I can take a year or so to breathe and do the things I want to do like getting back into playing the piano, learning a new language, reading books, catching up on movies and shows, regaining my health and getting fit, things like that. I just feel like I’m starting to fall into depression all over again. I’m not there yet only because I have strong people to lean on, but I feel like I’m slowly falling back into the hole.
"The worst thing about falling to pieces is that humans can do it so quietly."
"I want to explain how exhausted I am. Even in my dreams. How I wake up tired. How I’m being drowned by some kind of black wave."
"You’ve got to show the world who you are before it tells you. Otherwise you become victim to someone you’re not."
"Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm."
"You never get over it. But you get to where it doesn’t bother you so much."
"I just want somebody who will never stop choosing me."
Tonight is one of those annoying nights. And all I wanted to do was spend some cash on my favorite comfort food with my favorite person, WITHOUT having to argue about it for over 15 minutes.
I’m the type of person that if I’m having a bad day and I want to go out to wind down, I’ll would definitely go out of my way to pick whomever up to do whatevers and take them home. But if someone argues with me for that long I’ll end up not wanting to do anything at all and instead go home and continue to feel like crap for the rest of the night.
Guess I’m staying in tonight.
At times like these I really wish I still had a ‘bestfriend’. Whatever happened to our friendship? We used to talk everyday or at least twice a week. I would know what’s going on in your life and you would know about mines. Now we don’t talk anymore. Not even a text. I wish our friendship could be like how it used to be. I miss you.
It was so easy pretending to be okay when I was out with everyone. All the noise and laughter calmed every bone in my body. Once all of that stopped, my world crumbled in an instant.